Some time ago I stumbled upon a useful blog called Marc and Angel Hack Life. Mark and Angel’s common sense and wisdom are a breath of fresh air. Here is a link to their blog:
The following question is theirs with comments of my own.
“What made you feel good about yourself today?”
I printed out this question and several others of theirs and posted them on my refrigerator. I don’t ask this question of my husband often enough, but I’m trying. It’s a thought-provoking question that I initially thought bordered on narcissism. But when directed to the love of my life, it gives me an insight into his experiences that day. It prods me to have meaningful conversations about his wins of the day so I can acknowledge and celebrate them with him.
I found that this easier question works as a starter before asking the harder question above.
“What made you feel good today?”
It’s a chance to recall the blessings of the day. Taking time to verbalize the happy events of the day reminds us to be grateful for big and small things. It also gives us enjoyment all over again just remembering those growing turkey adolescents (not referring to kids!) who came through our yard harvesting bugs or the satisfaction of lending a hand to a neighbor.
I’ve found that the answers to the first and second questions often overlap. He enjoyed helping the neighbor (what made him feel good today) and he felt gratification that his skills solved the neighbor’s problem (what made him feel good about himself).
These questions would work for your children and grandchildren as well as your spouse. I hope you use them often.