wisteria-ed-oil-motherOn the anniversary of her death recently, I realized it had been fifty years since my mother went home to be with Jesus.  That’s a long time ago!  Even at the time, although I had a very close relationship with her, I didn’t begrudge her the release from the illness that had drained the life out of her.  I was happy that her life with Jesus was so much happier than her hard earthy life had been.  But this week leading up to Mother’s Day, it struck me that I haven’t had a mother for 50 years.  How should I write about celebrating Mother’s Day when I, myself, haven’t celebrated it with a mother since I was a teenager?  I can remember stressing as a kid that my mother’s birthday and Mother’s Day were close together. What could I give her and how could I make it special since I was the only one in her life who cared about such things?  heartmindsoulstrength-Path-of-Life feat

I’m thinking some of my readers are stressing about Mother’s Day right now.  Many of my readers are my age and also don’t have a living mother to celebrate.  You may even be dealing with unpleasant memories of your mother who has already passed on and there’s no way to fix things.  Or your mother may still be living, but distant.  She may have intentionally or unintentionally hurt you.  May I gently remind you that forgiveness is commanded by Jesus?  And BTW, it’s an ongoing process.  Every time an ugly memory surfaces, release it by laying it down at Jesus’ cross and relinquishing your desire to get back at her.  Leave the repayment to God.  He understands your hurt and he understands her.  He knows what happened in her life to make her that way.  She will stand before God on judgment day- and so will you.  I’m going to mention again this week my abused friend’s insight into this issue.  Read below an excerpt from last week’s blog.  

Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say,

“I will take revenge;
I will pay them back,” says the Lord.  (quoting Deuteronomy 32:35)
 Instead,
“If your enemies are hungry, feed them.
If they are thirsty, give them something to drink
In doing this, you will heap
burning coals of shame on their heads.”  (Quoting Proverbs 25:21-22)

 Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good. Romans 12:17-21

ImageProxy.mvcSome of my readers are stressing about Mother’s Day because family gatherings aren’t relaxed and happy, but tense and strained.  Take comfort in the fact that Jesus understands.  His family dynamics were often tense.  His family didn’t understand him.  His siblings didn’t support him.  In fact, they ridiculed him.  His dear mother tried to manipulate him.  In fact, he said that families would be fractured because of faith issues.  This doesn’t have to happen, but we should be prepared if it does.  We just have to make sure we aren’t offensive, even when our beliefs are.  We know that those in our faith community will become family to us and support us when our own families don’t.

Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his relatives and his own family.”  Mark 6:4

Jesus’ brothers said to him, “Leave here and go to Judea, where your followers can see your miracles!  You can’t become famous if you hide like this! If you can do such wonderful things, show yourself to the world!” For even his brothers didn’t believe in him.  John 7:4-5

Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.”
 He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”  Matthew 12:47-50

Jesus’ mother was there,  and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding.  When the wine was gone, Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no more wine.”
 “Woman, why do you involve me?” Jesus replied. “My hour has not yet come.  His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”  John 2:2-5

“Do you think I have come to bring peace to the earth? No, I have come to divide people against each other!  From now on families will be split apart, three in favor of me, and two against—or two in favor and three against.”  Jesus in Luke 12:51-52

gentle-touch-portraits-sonSome of my readers are stressing about Mother’s Day because you’ll feel the sting of rejection yet again.  Holidays are hard because one or some of your kids have forgotten the sweet days when you were close and now refuse to reach out and even so much as greet you.  You feel hurt.  You feel angry.  You feel guilty.  What did I do wrong?  Why are they so spiteful?  Or uncaring?  Will it ever be different?  What am I supposed to do?  Take your hurts and worries to Jesus.  He can empathize with you.  When things turned ugly, even his best friends abandoned him.  One claimed he never even knew Jesus. He understands what it’s like to feel lonely and rejected.

Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable.  Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.  Romans 12:17-18

“Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”  1 Peter 5:7

For Further Reading

From last week’s blog

A wise friend of mine was sharing how she as an adult has dealt with childhood physical abuse from her mother.  She knew she had forgiven her mother.  She had compassion on her mother because her mother’s circumstances were difficult.  But my friend was still carrying the emotional and physical pain caused by her mother as well as her mother’s pain.  One day she got a mental picture of herself as a child being shaken violently by her mother.  Then Jesus came between her and her mother.  He carried her mother to the cross and laid her down without resistance or cooperation from her mom.  Then he took the little girl by the hands and lifted her to her feet and she was a grown woman.  All the hurt she carried had been taken away and laid at the cross of Christ.  I think our forgiveness allows Jesus to release us from the painful results of others’ sins against us.

From the Mother’s Day blog post in 2016

Mother's-DayOther Mother’s Day blog posts

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4 Comments

  1. Joy says:

    Lovely words as always. The pain of losing a mother never goes away. First Mothers Day without my dear mom of blessed memory on Sunday. Love you. Joy

    1. Grandma Grace says:

      Oh, dear Joy, my heart goes out to you this Mother’s Day. Love you. Sending prayers and hugs. L

  2. Lisa says:

    You always minister to me. You’re the finest example of a mother and the epitome of a Proverbs 31 woman. Happy Mother’s Day to you my dear friend. Miss you so much. Much love, Lisa♥️🌹

    1. Grandma Grace says:

      Happy Mother’s Day to you, dear friend! You held your family together through the tough times. Makes me so happy to see the blessings you’re getting now. What fine children you have mothered to almost maturity! Love you. Thanks for the very kind words of affirmation. They are sweet to hear-even if I don’t fully deserve them!

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