When I have more than I can handle, I want to complain to someone, anyone who will listen. I want to spout off about how much I have to do and how little time I have to do it in. I want some pity and maybe if I’m honest, I want to feel important. (I must be important since I’m busy and have responsibilities, right?) However, talking about the heavy load doesn’t make me feel any better about the prospects of actually getting through the thing. Often it only enlarges the thing in my mind the more my mouth describes it in discouraging detail.
A wise woman named Davina recommends some guidelines for complaining:
Give yourself a time limit for dumping on someone.
Then stop and ask them for suggestions of actions that will get you going in the right direction.
She also suggests focusing on what you have accomplished so far. Sharing these victories verbally with someone will rekindle your own hope. I also know it will be a positive topic of conversation which might encourage your listener.
“Staying focused on the genuinely good stuff that’s been happening or looking at how far you’ve come and sharing that with people will be enough to get you re-energized about what’s ahead and your ability to manage it all.” Davina Fear
“Those who complain the most, accomplish the least. – It’s always better to attempt to do something great and fail than to attempt to do nothing and succeed. It’s not over if you’ve lost; it’s over when you do nothing but complain about it. If you believe in something, keep trying. Don’t let the shadows of the past darken the doorstep of your future. Spending today complaining about yesterday won’t make tomorrow any brighter. Take action instead. And regardless of what happens in the long run, remember that true happiness begins to arrive only when you stop complaining about your problems and you start being grateful for all the problems you don’t have.” Mark and Angel Hack Life
An article by Davina Fear called, “Out of Overwhelm” inspired this post.