I like being at home in my own comfortable nest doing what I like to do when I want to do it.  It’s not that I want to lie around eating bon-bons.  I just like being busy doing what I choose.  How about you?  But what if that lifestyle makes us stagnant?  What if we’re like wine and get bitter if left on our dregs?*  What if we need challenges?  What if we don’t improve without difficulties in our lives?  What if God uses other people to sharpen us and make us more useful?  What if selfishness doesn’t make us happy?  The following story is very mundane and is most likely not like your situation but if you read it like a parable, perhaps you’ll be able to adapt some of the ideas to your life. This is a slice-of-life story with a deeper lesson.

Several months ago we were visiting old friends in another city.  I couldn’t help but notice that their lives were much different from ours.  They were heavily involved in their community.  They were active physically and relationally.  They were still growing and learning in many areas.  I thought of my own homebody life.  Many weeks I didn’t leave our country home except to go to church.  There’s so much to do at home, why go out?  But there was a nagging thought that I needed to step out of the comfort zone of home.  Was God trying to enlarge my world?  I resisted.  I’m happy at home.  I have plenty of work to do at home.  It’s peaceful and quiet at home.  I learn a lot online at home.  But the idea of leaving my safe haven persisted.  Finally, I made a few forays into the community.  I reasoned that my home business was virtually unknown except to my friends at church, so I should join some networking groups to get my name out there.  I started going to Chamber of Commerce meetings in nearby towns.  In my search for networking groups, I stumbled upon a Christian businesswomen’s group in the city.  Yuck.  I hate driving into the city from our quiet country place.  But I forced myself to give it a try.  Dear husband even dropped me off at my first meeting while he ran errands so I didn’t have to drive alone the first time.  I was immediately welcomed into the group.  It’s been a couple of months since I shakily stepped into this new life of pushing my limiting boundaries.  It’s been great making new friends.  I’m just at the point where I know some of them well enough to serve them.  Serving is rarely convenient.  Others’ schedules have to be taken into consideration.  Others’ preferences need to be honored.  Funny how when you work together, you go to a whole new level of friendship.  And there are inevitable bumps in the road.  That’s when I need to change my thinking about difficulties. It’s not only hard to give up my comfort, to be brave and try new things, but it’s also hard to nurture friendships. 

Why is it that when I encounter something in my life that is hard, I immediately label it, ‘Bad’?  Every time I see a friend’s faults.  Every time I have to try a new skill.  Every time I feel an especially heavy responsibility.  Every time I’m dragged out of my comfort zone, I think of it as a negative thing.  But what if God changed my thinking?  What if I stopped dreading the hard things and embraced them because of their good effects?  What if I imagined what good could come from these hard things?  Looking forward to the results could help me be more positive going into difficulties.

I’m not naturally optimistic, positive, and up for the next challenge.  Nope.  My default is pessimism, negativity, and fear.  But I’m glad.  Yep.  This way I’m reminded all day long that I need God.  I need him to give me hope, faith, and courage.  I need him all the time.

So, I’ve been trying a new approach to hard things.

“Thank you, Lord, for putting this challenge in my life so I can grow.  Thank you that this hard thing is meant to make me better.  Thank you that you’re walking with me through it.  It is making me realize that I need to improve in these areas:  __________(naming them specifically helps me work on them).  Please give me the humility I need to be teachable in this situation.  Help me to check my motives.  Am I doing this with love in my heart and the desire to help others?  Or am I trying to look good (or just cowering and hoping it will all go away)?  I know this challenge you’ve given me is actually a privilege.  It’s a privilege to walk forward and learn more about you and more about what you formed me to do.  Please give me the courage and confidence in you that I need to meet this challenge.  I know you’re for me and with me and have a good outcome planned for me and I’m so grateful.”

Acceptance- I’m trading in my negativity for acceptance and trust

Gratitude- I’m pitching out the inner complainer and nurturing the inner thanker.

Confidence in God- I’m not deluded enough to think that I can handle anything.  But I can with Jesus by my side.

Outcome perspective- I’m ditching the dread and embracing a happy outcome.

Love for others- I’m focusing on what I can do for others instead of my fears.

Humility – I’m tired of defending myself and want to listen with a teachable heart.

Courage – I’m sick of shrinking back.  I’m ready to step forward in God’s power.

Are you with me?

“Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us.  Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory.

 We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.  And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.”  Romans 5:1-5

*Here is an interesting parallel between wine and us.

Proper transference makes wine taste better. So pour it out!
By Joseph Nase

Why do we decant?
Obviously, it’s not the mere act of shifting liquid from one container to another that accounts for the magic of decanting. Rather, when you decant a bottle of wine, two things happen. First, slow and careful decanting allows wine (particularly older wine) to separate from its sediment, which, if left mixed in with the wine, will impart a very noticeable bitter, astringent flavor. Second, when you pour wine into a decanter, the resulting agitation causes the wine to mix with oxygen, enabling it to develop and come to life at an accelerated pace (this is particularly important for younger wine). http://nymag.com/restaurants/articles/wine/essentials/decanting.htm

(the Lord will) punish those who are complacent,
    who are like wine left on its dregs,
who think, ‘The Lord will do nothing,
    either good or bad.’  Zephaniah 1:12