What does God think of me?  Recently I had the privilege of getting some personalized soul care.  The wise woman who had been mentoring me over the past 5 months had suggested that another woman join us for a time of guided prayer as we wrapped up our study together.  During this time, I was asked what I feel God thinks of me.  That stopped me cold.  I knew the correct answer was that God loves me.  But suddenly, all I could think of were a whole lot of reasons why God wouldn’t be pleased with me.  I know mentally that God loves me, but is he happy with me?  I certainly don’t measure up to even my own standards, so obviously I can’t/don’t measure up to his.  Why should he look on me favorably?  Yes, I believe that he doesn’t hold our sins against us because Jesus was the perfect sacrifice to pay for our sins.  But on a visceral level, there was a great big feeling of falling short.  I don’t worry about my eternal destination, but to say that I felt God’s smile on me was a stretch.  

What would you say if someone asked you to describe how God feels about you?  I decided to do some Scripture searching to find out what God says about his feelings toward me.  And some soul searching as to whether I really believe what he says.  And whether those beliefs are freeing me to step out of fear and into faith.  

Doubt:  He isn’t pleased with me because I still sin on a daily basis.

Fact:  He loves me so much that he won’t leave me where I am.  He will continue to work on me and move me closer to being like Jesus.  In the process, he is actually looking at me with the knowledge that eventually he will complete the work he started in me.  He understands that it’s a process.  He knows as long as I live in this body, I’ll do/think wrongly.  But he knows the happy day is coming when I’ll join him and all the inclination to do wrong will be gone forever.  When I was a young, exasperated mom and my two-year-old was flipping out, I didn’t have the perspective to look at her and realize that one day she would be a gentle and patient mom handling her own two-year-old with aplomb.  But God looks ahead at what he’s making us into.  So he isn’t angry or discouraged when he sees us now.

“He will keep you strong to the end so that you will be free from all blame on the day when our Lord Jesus Christ returns.  God will do this, for he is faithful to do what he says, and he has invited you into partnership with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”  1 Corinthians 1:8-9  (But the next sentence Paul launches into correcting their errors.  So there is the hope of being blameless when we die, even tho we sin and have shortcomings now.)

Doubt:  I cringe in fear of the next bad thing happening.

Fact:  His intentions toward me are good.  No matter what happens, I can count on him to give me contentment and true happiness.  Reminding myself to appreciate the little and big things I’ve been given today and deeply enjoying them as gifts from him trains my heart to be positive and ready to face difficulties with confidence in a good Father.

“So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba (Daddy), Father.”  For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God’s children.  And since we are his children, we are his heirs. In fact, together with Christ we are heirs of God’s glory. . . Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?  No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.”  Romans 8:15-17,35,37

“For God chose to save us through our Lord Jesus Christ, not to pour out his anger on us.  Christ died for us so that, whether we are dead or alive when he returns, we can live with him forever.  So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.”  1 Thessalonians 5:9-11

“For God saved us and called us to live a holy life. He did this, not because we deserved it, but because that was his plan from before the beginning of time—to show us his grace through Christ Jesus.”  2 Timothy 1:9

Doubt:  I’ve messed things up.  How can things ever turn out well?

Fact: God is in control.  We can’t mess up his plan.  Everything is moving toward a happy end. 

As a child, my mother took me to a church where I enjoyed hearing wonderful stories from the Bible.  But when I was in junior high, my church drifted away from teaching the Scriptures.  I craved learning about the Bible so I decided to visit a different church that was within walking distance of my apartment.  There I got a happy feeling every time that pastor got up to speak and said, “Let’s open our Bibles to ……”  I felt like I was sitting down to a banquet.  Often at the close of the church service, the pastor would stand in front of the congregation and raise his gnarled, old hands in blessing over us and repeat this verse,

“To him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.”  Jude 24-25

My heart would take such comfort in this.  God was able to keep me from falling and bring me into his presence without fault and with great joy.  He was strong to help me and he wouldn’t hold my faults against me.  What hope!

Doubt:  I really want to please God, but my determination fades sometimes.  Doesn’t God get tired of me flaking out?

Fact:  He whispers correction at the first sign of us getting off the right path.  He doesn’t leave us on our own to figure out life.  His Spirit is constantly giving us input.  He gives us that quiet voice that nudges us when our attitude gets sour.  He keeps reminding us to ask for forgiveness or give it.  He reminds us to pray.  If we pay attention and correct course, he pours out peace, hope, and happiness even in the face of difficulty.  He never promised an easy path, just that he’ll be with us on the path.  

“Christ Jesus, our Savior broke the power of death and illuminated the way to life and immortality. . . for I know the one in whom I trust, and I am sure that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him [me] until the day of his return.  Through the power of the Holy Spirit who lives within us, carefully guard the precious truth that has been entrusted to you.”  2 Timothy 1:10,12,14