Our sons and daughters gave us the best 50th-anniversary celebration this past weekend.  It was exactly what we had wanted but dared not hope for – having all of our six children together.  Because one daughter and her family live in the Midwest far from our Pacific Northwest home, it just didn’t seem feasible for her to come.  They’re launching a new business, airline tickets have recently become ridiculously expensive, she has four children, blah, blah.  We were just happy to be invited to our youngest son’s beautiful new home to celebrate with the children and grandchildren that live in our state.  As soon as we arrived, I scanned the group for our dear far away daughter just in case.  But, alas, she wasn’t there.  But after a few minutes, there was a stir and someone was coming down the stairs toward the great room where we were gathered.  Oh, the tears flowed when we realized that both our daughter and her husband had come after all!  All of the siblings were together!  And their spouses had come as well as all of our grandchildren except for our Midwest grandchildren. Our hearts overflowed as well as our eyes.  Twenty-three of us together in happy unity.  Thank you, God!

  One of the many happy takeaways from our wonderful weekend with our family was how powerful it is when couples work together.  We’re impressed with the teamwork we observe in our kids’ spousal relationships.  How grateful we are for our beloved daughters-in-law and sons-in-law.  Seeing them support, encourage, and help each other makes us so happy. I love seeing how each one is operating in their strengths and contributing what the other needs.    I don’t see competition.  I see cooperation and communication.  I don’t see ego.  I see humility and consideration for the other.  I see respect and love translated into daily action.  I so admire the Dads who in spite of carrying a heavy load of providing for their families still give their attention to their children every day;  the wives who nurture loving family relationships and open their homes to us; the respectful communication between partners; the kind consideration of the other’s needs by sharing the work of the household; and sacrificing personal desires for the good of the family. 

 I think it’s noteworthy that in the opening stories of two of the Gospels in the New Testament, we see two couples who exemplify marital love and consideration.  All four of these individuals had a close, personal walk with God.  A strong foundation for a harmonious marriage is both partners loving and obeying God.  The Scriptures explain that Zechariah and Elizabeth, the parents of John the Baptizer, were both obedient to God. Scripture reports that “Both of them were righteous in the sight of God, observing all the Lord’s commands and decrees blamelessly”. We know that Joseph “was faithful to the law. . .” and Mary was addressed by the angel as, “you who are highly favored”.

Scripture records specific conversations in which both Elizabeth and Mary express deep personal faith and gratitude toward God.  Elizabeth clearly credits God with her miraculous old-age pregnancy, “ “The Lord has done this for me,” she said. “In these days he has shown his favor . . “  Mary, also, credits God for her own miraculous pregnancy. “My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant.  The Mighty One has done great things for me- holy is his name.”

Besides being righteous, both Zechariah and Joseph demonstrated consideration for their wives. I giggle every time I read Zechariah’s discreet way of describing his aged Elizabeth.  He referred to himself as an old guy, but had a more delicate description for his wife, “I am an old man and my wife is well along in years,” he told the angel when told they would have a baby in their old age.   How tender!  He also carried their heartache of childlessness to God.  I’m guessing that Elizabeth had been praying for a child for decades, but we know that Zechariah had been pleading with God also because the angel said, “Zechariah; your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son…”  After the angel had given him the message that they would have a child in their old age, he returned home and let Elizabeth know about the heavenly promise.  Because he was struck mute by the angel for his initial unbelief, he would have had to write down for her the cause of his condition and the wonderful promise.  Communication and respect are seen in their relationship.  When the promised baby arrived and it was time to name him, Zecheriah still couldn’t speak so Elizabeth insisted on the name her husband had written down for her from the angel even in the face of pressure from others.  She stood up for his wishes even when he couldn’t express his wishes.  

Joseph also showed a deep consideration for his wife-to-be when faced with the shocking news that she was pregnant even though they had not had sexual relations.  Obviously, she must have been with another man despite them being legally bound to one another.  In his deep disappointment, he still hung onto consideration for her, not wishing to cause her harm.  “Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.”  This is the epitome of concern for another who had wounded him so deeply and betrayed him, or so he thought.  But when God sent him an angelic vision that told him to marry Mary who had conceived by the Holy Spirit, he was obedient immediately.  “When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife.  But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son.”  He was obedient to God and humble enough to go back to Mary.

Consideration for the other, respect, humility, communication, teamwork, and obedience to God have been demonstrated to us by these two couples in Scripture.  We can identify with them whether old marrieds like Zechariah and Elizabeth and or young marrieds like Joseph and Mary.  (Their stories are found in Matthew 1 and Luke 1.)  Let’s follow their good example!  The next generation will thank you.