One year ago this week Husband and I arrived at our oldest daughter’s house after a  cross-continental drive ahead of and detouring around a  blizzard.  We had sold our comfy home and were embarking on the adventure of building our own house close to family.  That is, Husband would build us a house.  I’ve never added construction skills to my short list of abilities!  Our daughter allowed us to park an RV smack dab in her side yard and generously opened her home to us complete with shower privileges, freezer space and two precious granddaughters to start getting to know after our absence of ten years.  We had it made the first four months. Then we needed to move our RV to our building site so we could work on our house without having to leave to eat and rest during the hot summer months.  So far, so good.  But then the rains began.  Fall and Winter in the Pacific Northwest are wet, chilly, and at our place- windy, muddy and sometimes icy/snowy.  Uh, oh.  So here is what I learned the second six months of our year in an RV.  The report of what I learned the first six months has a  cheerful ring to it.  You can read it here.

I’ve learned that compact morphs into cramped when winter weather prevents being outdoors or even leaving in a vehicle.  So thankful we love each other.  And thankful this RV living is coming to an end.

I’ve learned that God is merciful and doesn’t force me farther than he enables me to go.

I’ve learned that we all have limits.  It’s healthier if I communicate when I’ve hit the wall of my limits. Being honest alerts Husband and others so they can enlist in the Helper Corp.  (Also prevents a meltdown.)  Being honest prevents the anger and resentment of unmet needs.  If I don’t tell anyone, how can I expect them to be my back-up?

I’ve learned that God walks thru my trials with me.

I’ve learned that God delivers me from trials at the right time.  I’ve learned that a trial doesn’t last forever.  Either we’re delivered from it after we learn what we need to in order to be a better person who can help others, or we get to go home to heaven to be delivered permanently.  I had the luxury of knowing one of my trials would have an end soon.  Our little house would be completed and I would never have to set foot in an RV again.

I’ve learned that my living environment has a strong effect on me.  Positively or negatively.  Whether I realize it or not.  Both physically (Ouch!), mentally, and emotionally.  Denying the triggers for physical pain in my environment is counterproductive.  Admitting it and making whatever changes are possible is productive.   Hoping now I’m more empathetic towards those whose living environments are sabotaging them.  I want to help them change their circumstances.  I’m determined to be a good steward of our new house, keeping it clean and uncluttered to maximize its positive impact.

I’ve learned that self-care isn’t selfish.  If I’m not coping, it’s no favor to those around me.

I’ve learned that making a conscious choice about self-care is important.  I determined not to self-medicate with things that are detrimental- shopping ‘therapy’, wasting time waiting for my circumstances to change, complaining.  I determined to help myself by spending time with family, positive friends, going to church and small group study, keeping in touch with far-away friends, learning new skills, reading Scripture and meditating on it through the day, and yes, writing this blog.

I’ve learned that my own laziness deprived me of outdoor exercise that could have helped my outlook.  Excuses I used:  too cold/windy/ rainy; too icy/snowy- that one is legitimate, the risk was greater than the benefit.  A friend has offered a treadmill when we move into the new house so I’ll have no excuse for not exercising!

I’ve learned, no, I’m learning to be less quick to judge others.  Maybe the reason they wear the same couple of outfits to church is because they live in an RV with small closets.  Maybe their hair isn’t looking the best because they live in an RV with a small hot water tank and they can’t rinse the soap out of their hair.  Just sayin’ that I’ve appreciated the goodwill and grace of others when we’ve been less than attractive specimens.  I hope I am learning to overlook the flaws of others.

I’ve learned that I’ve had to eat my words.  We always sniffed at restaurant eating- not healthy, too expensive, we said.  But we found that eating out is a good way to take a break from a cramped space.  Healthy meals can be prepared in tiny spaces, but they come at a high premium – pain from my non-ergonomic RV kitchen. So I’m very grateful for a little Chinese restaurant only 5 miles from our house that has been part of my sanity plan.  We’ve grown to love the kind owner and look forward to seeing her once a week.  And leftovers give us a meal the next day.

I’ve learned that I will appreciate the little things a lot more having been without them.  But I always remember that most of the world’s population have never enjoyed these little luxuries nor can they hope to.  So I don’t want to sound as if I think I deserve these, but I plan to enjoy a warm shower for more than 2 minutes before the hot water is gone.  I look forward to standing upright at my kitchen sink with a toe kick to put my toes under the sink instead of leaning forward awkwardly with my toes crammed against the cabinet, and not having to duck to miss hitting my head on overhanging cabinets.  I’ll enjoy light from big windows.  I’ll be so happy to be able to offer guests a place to sit.  Come see us next month!

I’ve learned that the physical pain, the mental stress, the daily inconveniences, can’t hold a candle to the privilege of being part of the lives of our adult kids and grandkids.  Nothing can rival the joy of living near enough to say at the end of a visit, “See you soon!” instead of, “See you next year.”  It’s been so worth the sacrifices to hear a teenage granddaughter say as we’re driving with the window down in freezing cold so she can snap photos of beautiful snow scenes, “This is so fun, Grandma.  I love taking photos.  And it doesn’t cost us anything.”  Of course, she doesn’t realize it, but it cost Husband and me a lot.  But the cost can’t compare with the abounding reward!

P.S.  The photos in this blog post were taken by my granddaughter.

“I took my troubles to the Lord; I cried out to him, and he answered my prayer.”  David in Psalm 120:1

“The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time.”  David in Psalm 34:19

“He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”  Paul in 2 Corinthians 1:4

“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.”  James in James 1:2