A few days ago I was driving by a barn. Immediately I cringed inside. It isn’t that I don’t like barns. I cringed because the barn reminded me of an undone project. I had promised my teenage granddaughter that we’d photograph old barns together. That familiar, accusing voice hissed- “You haven’t even started your project to photograph cool old barns. You’re letting your loved one down. You’re a loser.” But before that hateful voice finished, a gentle voice whispered, “I’m right here with you to help you do that project.” Ah, the sweetness, the peace of my Shepherd’s voice! I can do it – with help.
I’ve been beaten up by that accusatory voice my whole life. I’ll bet you have, too. Multiple times a day I realize I’ve fallen short of my goals, my duties, my aspirations and then the voice slams me. “You never get done. You’re slow and inefficient. You waste time. You should work harder.” But what if every time I realized my shortcomings, I shut down the hiss and listened for the gentle voice?
Do I believe the spirit of Jesus is in me to help me? Am I convinced God himself is for me? Am I sure he has good planned for me? Am I aware that the enemy of my soul wants to tear me down?
Several years ago a truth began to work it’s way deep into my thinking and feeling. I work for a kind Boss. He knows my limits, my weaknesses, my failings. So he treats me gently and patiently because he knows. He also knows my heart’s desire is to please him and do what he tells me. So he holds my hand when my steps falter and he smiles at our successes. (Not my successes, our successes.)
I first started becoming aware of the kindness of my Boss on a daily, personal level several years ago. I remember driving home worrying that I wouldn’t have supper ready by the agreed upon time. I was late because I had made choices based on my values. I had chosen to spend time on a relationship and now I was rushing home in a panic praying for green traffic lights. No sooner had I gotten home then I got a call. “I have to work late. Sorry.” A sigh of relief. My Boss is kind.
So if I work for a kind Boss, I shouldn’t feel put down all the time. Apparently, I’m not listening to my Boss. I’ve 
been listening to other voices – mean voices that have no authority over me. Negative voices that lie about my worth. I’m starting to recognize some of those nasty voices. One of the voices is my past; one from the enemy of my soul, one from my pride/ego, one from others. They tell me lies about myself mixed with just enough truth to be believable. It’s true that I haven’t made progress on that project. But it isn’t true that I’m a loser and will never get that project done.
I’m learning to listen to the kind voice. The one that reminds me I’m loved, forgiven and empowered. I haven’t even gotten started on my project, but I’m not in this alone. I’ve checked my motives and my goal is worthwhile since it will contribute to the happiness of others and to my self-development. So I can count on power beyond my own. My Boss is in the guide service business. He gently leads me on an upward path. Not content to leave me the way I am, with my cooperation, he’s making me a much better version of myself. Then after work, I get to go Home to a happy celebration party. See you there!
“. . . the sheep recognize his voice and come to him. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they know his voice.” John 10:3-4
“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.” John 10:27