I challenge you to use this trigger for being thankful.  Every time you encounter the word Thanksgiving over the next three weeks stop for 5 seconds and thank God for one thing –  especially when the word Thanksgiving triggers anxious thoughts instead of thankful thoughts.  For example, you just read the word Thanksgiving and realized you have only 3 weeks to make your family Thanksgiving happen.  Immediately, if you’re like me, instead of thanking God for one thing your brain goes into hyperdrive and you think of ten things you need to do.  One or more of those ten things will be difficult.  It might be difficult because there are relationships involved.  If you’re like me, your first response may be to push that difficult thing aside and put off dealing with it.  In that moment of anxiety, why not talk to the Lord about it?  Ask him for help with the situation.  Thank him for something about the person involved in your worry.  Ask God to walk with you as you work on solving the details of your Thanksgiving.  Thank him for caring about your details.  Thank him for being merciful.  Now write down what you need to do to move forward toward a peaceful resolution and an enjoyable Thanksgiving including who you need to contact, what information you need to get to them, etc.  In the end, the only important thing about Thanksgiving is relationships.  God wants to help us nurture our relationships.

Because Husband and I were living on the opposite side of the country from our adult children for ten years, they established Thanksgiving traditions without us.  When we moved back, we knew we shouldn’t disrupt those traditions.  So for the second year we accepted my cousins’ invitation to get together for a cousin Thanksgiving at a location about 3.5 hours away.  Two single cousins will fly in from out of state and caravan with us to the fourth cousin’s town. This will be precious time to reconnect after two years apart because of the pandemic.  We will be celebrating our cousin’s daughter’s completion of cancer treatment and thanking God for her recovery.

While I was looking forward to anticipated happy times, dear Husband suddenly brought me back to reality.  “What about the dog?”  Yikes!  I hadn’t thought about our sweet, but overly enthusiastic puppy.  Indeed, what do we do about Boon?  Immediately I reverted back to my despicable habit of procrastination.  I’ll deal with that later because it’s painful to have to ask family members to dogsit this rambunctious animal.  I don’t want to cause them trouble so I’ll ignore the problem until it’s an emergency.  Nope.  Not this time.  I breathe a prayer for God’s help thanking him that he actually does bother about his children and even about their dogs.  I thank the Lord for my precious family and the fact that they take time out of their busy lives to spend time with us.  I pray for God’s mercy to help me protect our relationship and not ask more than I should.  Then I wrote down the information I need to get and the people I need to talk to regarding puppysitting. Although it took me 24 hours to get up my courage, I actually contacted family members to ask this big favor.  God does care and he can help us change bad habits like procrastination.  Most of all, he helps us become better people so we can enjoy better relationships.  Are there things you need to do soon to insure your relationships at Thanksgiving are nurtured?

Here’s a list of questions I made years ago but is still helpful in planning a happy Thanksgiving:

What do I treasure most about past Thanksgivings?
When I remember past Thanksgivings, what warm feelings come up?  What tense feelings?  Do other family members remember the same feelings?
What can I do to set the stage for getting those treasured warm feelings this year?
What was a problem or burden last year?  What could I do to avoid that this year?

How much time, money and effort do I have to invest?

How could I encourage guests to participate after their arrival at my house/other location?
What will help guests interact with each other?
How can I encourage storytelling and sharing?  Have questions hidden under chairs?  Many families go around the table and share what they’re thankful for. Who can moderate this sharing session?  How can I encourage quiet guests to share?  Encourage children to share?  

How can I keep memories of this Thanksgiving?  Assign someone to take candid photos? Get professional family portraits done?  Have guests write something? Video?

If my circumstances prevent hosting, what can I do to contribute to someone’s Thanksgiving being happy?
Remind myself this is more than a meal!  This is all about relationships.  

If you’re hosting:

Who should be included?  Get creative here.  We often divide up family get-togethers since there are so many of us and we have a small house.  One of our adult children and their family come on one day just for dessert because they celebrate the day of Thanksgiving at the in-laws.  Another part of our family come on a day that better fits their schedule and we share leftovers.  Think of someone besides family who needs to be included.  Students away from home, elderly and alone, refugees, so many need to be loved on.
Am I willing to let others contribute?  (When guests invest in the meal they are buying into the celebration and feel part of the festivities.) 
Have I asked about food allergies?  Dietary restrictions?
How much chaos can I tolerate in my kitchen?  How many people are welcome to help in my kitchen?  How much last minute prep am I comfortable with?
What can I do ahead?  Do I have freezer room?  Fridge room?  What can I clean out now to make room for Thanksgiving preps?  
Plan the table including enough plates, serving pieces, and chairs, also napkins/runner/placemats, centerpiece.   Here’s one inspiration for setting the Thanksgiving table.
Plan the menu including who brings what, what can be cooked ahead.  Internet search for holiday/party meal prep for great checklists.
What can occupy young guests? I can assign age-appropriate tasks like setting the table, or I could prepare a craft for them to make. What could elderly guests do to feel involved? Could someone play an instrument, read aloud, dance, or lead a game?
Be flexible.  It’s not about impressing others.  It isn’t about everything going smoothly.  It’s about honoring relationships.

Keep reminding myself that this is more than a meal!  This is all about relationships.  

Remember that God helps us nurture relationships.  He told us to love each other and since he is love, he has lots of love to give us to give to others!

  “Be devoted to one another in love.  Honor one another above yourselves.”  Romans 12:10