We got a distraught call yesterday from a family member.  It was heart-wrenching.  She had had a Zoom meeting with a court mediator regarding custody of her children.   It was conducted unfairly.  There was no accountability for irresponsible behavior.  The outcome of the meeting was unreasonable.  We hung up from the conversation with a heavy heart.  The government had failed us.  Justice was not given.  What about the children?  Where is God in this?  Just then an alarm went off in my head.  Wait a minute, this is exactly what I’ve been reading about in Scripture!  I better be careful how I react to this hard thing!  Will I test God or rest in him?

The Bible records two sad stories about folks who experienced very difficult problems but chose to test God instead of rest in him.   These stories are examples for us to learn from so we don’t do the same thing.  But oh, boy, is it easy to act like them!  How often do we say the exact wrong words they said?!

“Why?”   Why did you bring us to this bad place?

“This is going to be the end of us.”   Realistic, but pessimistic  outlook.

“If only…”. If only we weren’t in these terrible circumstances.  If only I had what makes me happy and comfortable.

“I don’t have _________.”  God isn’t taking very good care of us or we’d have it.

“Is God really here for me?”  I don’t see him doing what I want, so maybe he doesn’t care.

The first story takes place in a nasty situation.  A huge group of people have just miraculously escaped the country where they had been held as slaves.  But the excitement and high hopes began to wear thin when they hit this serious problem.  The people are thirsty.  I mean really thirsty.  The climate is the worst- hot and dry.  The place is the worst- rocky and dusty.  The situation is dire.  This isn’t just a minor inconvenience, this is a life and death situation that is hard for us with homes that have water at the turn of a faucet to identify with.  They weren’t being overly dramatic when they said desperate things.   They had a desperate, legitimate need.  They weren’t being greedy or selfish in what they asked for.  Their families were hurting.  Their babies were crying.  Their children were whining.  Their cattle were lowing.  Moms were hot, tired, and worn down.  Dads felt helpless to fix it.  And there was no end in sight.  No springs ahead.  No oasis on the horizon.  So they did exactly what we would have done.  They got angry, grumpy, demanding, pessimistic, and even threatening.  And they forgot what kind of God was with them.  They forgot about their recent deliverance from slavery by the strong arm of God, and the mighty walls of water God had heaped up for them to pass safely between -the same walls that collapsed on their enemies and drowned them.  They forgot that God was faithful, powerful, and watching out for them.

“So they quarreled with Moses and said, “Give us water to drink.”
Moses replied, “Why do you quarrel with me? Why do you put the Lord to the test?” But the people were thirsty for water there, and they grumbled against Moses. They said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to make us and our children and livestock die of thirst?” Then Moses cried out to the Lord, “What am I to do with these people? They are almost ready to stone me.. . . Moses named the place Massah (which means “test”) and Meribah (which means “arguing”) because the people of Israel argued with Moses and tested the Lord by saying, “Is the Lord here with us or not?” Exodus 17:2-4, 6-7

The second story takes place 40 years later when they are close to entering the promised land. The situation was similar.  Hot, dry, dusty, rocky, thirsty.  No water.

“There was no water for the people to drink at that place, so they rebelled against Moses and Aaron.  The people blamed Moses and said, “If only we had died in the Lord’s presence with our brothers!  Why have you brought the congregation of the Lord’s people into this wilderness to die, along with all our livestock?  Why did you make us leave Egypt and bring us here to this terrible place? This land has no grain, no figs, no grapes, no pomegranates, and no water to drink!  Then Moses raised his hand and struck the rock twice with the staff, and water gushed out. So the entire community and their livestock drank their fill.”  Numbers 20:2-5,11

King David wrote about these stories generations later.  He gives us an inside look at the people’s behavior from God’s perspective.  Grumbling, hard hearts can’t experience God’s rest.

Today, if only you would hear his voice,
“Do not harden your hearts as you did at Meribah,
as you did that day at Massah in the wilderness, [the places they had no water and grumbled]
where your ancestors tested me;
they tried me, though they had seen what I did.
For forty years I was angry with that generation;
I said, ‘They are a people whose hearts go astray,
and they have not known my ways.’
So I declared on oath in my anger,
‘They shall never enter my rest.’”  Psalm 95:8-11

I don’t want to grumble and miss out on that calm place of resting in God.  I want to have a grateful heart in spite of bad circumstances.  (Very small example here:  Yesterday was yet another stormy, rainy, windy day.  The grey was wearing on me.  Then I stopped myself.  Wait a minute, I have big windows to watch the storm through.  I have a beautiful view of waving trees.  I’m warm, dry, and safe from the storm.  How do I have the nerve to complain about the weather?!)

I choose not to ask, “Why?”  Hanging up the phone after that upsetting conversation, I have to admit that the ‘why’ question came to mind.  What possible good could come out of this bad decision?  But I chose to lean into the understanding arms of Jesus.  I don’t need to know the why’s.  I need to trust my loving God.

I choose not to have a pessimistic outlook.  Like the people in the desert, our facts would lead us to assume a terrible outcome.  But God writes the end of the story.  And he has the power to write the end in a beautiful way.

I choose to wipe, ‘If only. . . ‘ from my vocabulary.  I refuse to think, ‘If only they would have had a different mediator.’  There were many prayers sent up to a caring God prior to this meeting.  I choose to believe that God heard and is answering in his way.

I want to stop complaining about what I don’t have.  I recognize it is my default to focus on what I don’t have instead of what I do have.  We didn’t get the decision we wanted yesterday, but we do have a God who sees and knows what we need.

I don’t want to demand what I want when I want it, or argue when I don’t get it.   God rarely operates on our time frame.  He is notoriously last minute so we  recognize how much we need him.  I’ll wait patiently with faith that he will work out this mess his way.

I refuse to question whether God is with us.  Even when unjust, and unreasonable decisions are made, I know God is with us.  He proved his love and care through the generations as recorded in the Bible.  The Lord Jesus gave up his life for us.  He has proven his loving-kindness throughout my whole life.  I think he deserves to be trusted.  My soul finds rest in God.